[text starts beneath the video; the video is an (english) fragment from the Radio Klotestad radiovideoshow (2022)
We have lost no hope, but the funds have been blown to other times. The rich times. The glamourous times. Here in the dark my fate/ faith threatens to tip the other way. A fish head floates to the bottom when i dive. Bicycle wrecks. A helmet.
Sadness can disappear in an instant, if you look for possibilities long enough. I don’t know those possibilities. I’m drifting, and that is my intention exactly. Along the logs, where a slight current can be felt. Slowly a large vortex draws me to the bottom, where some black hole sucks me in.
No more angels. No dogs. No sharks. Just water.
Back into the birth canal, past a wall massive plastic waste incarnate, pieces of Peer Klaes, Neemaar and Idvla logo’s as i slide past to the inside. I must remain calm, but will that work? I can’t hold my breath any longer, i have to gasp for air.
Just in time i fall into a waterless space, where there is apparently oxygen, because i can breath without difficulty. It looks like an aquarium, made of very thick green glass. It reminds me of the green glass bottle i had as a child. Air bubbles in the glass, when the sun shone through. The magical thought that i could live there if i wanted to.
And now that i’m here, seem to be here, there is nothing. Nothing but glass and almost opaque dirty water outside. Very vaguely i see the birth canal, diagonally above me. It could be the bottle neck. What now? Make a plan. But how? With what?
I have no data.
Where am i?
How do i get out of here? What is needed for that? How long can i last here? Is there any way back at all? Should i think differently? And how?
